Thursday, March 27, 2014

In case you were wondering what happened...

We all got eaten by zombies. Tune in next winter when we make yet another concerted effort to actually exercise all winter.

Sunday, December 1, 2013

Z6. December 1, 2013. Day 61

A very distinct memory occurs to you, as you gaze, bored, from your position in the lookout.  In front of you is a small sea of rot that extended in the lowland area along the eastern edge of the zombie refuge. You were young, riding in the backseat of the car. Drowsy. Your eyes opened and shut and the rhythm of the road bounced your head gently against the cloth interior wall of the vehicle as it drove down the unknown road.  You don't know where you were, and have only a rough guess of how old... but you do remember the smell. Horrid. Who knew that the tense fear of being chased and eaten, or worse, converted to a zombie by zombies would become irrelevant next to the smell of them permeating the air, day after day. If you never smell zombie again, it will be too soon.

The zombies wander along the plain in little groups, moving in the distance like clumps of algae floating across a pool, parted by an oar in water.  You stand and jump up and down to stay awake. The zombies are luckily lacking the brains that they had when still human, so they are not much of a nuisance. Well.  If you ignore the never-ending smell. And the inability to get fresh supplies.

A sound crackles across the radio, “Mayday! Mayday! Mayday!” The forest service camp had somehow become overrun, and the people were trapped in kitchen. Overrun? What had they been doing, exactly? The voice over the radio was non-specific as to the events. A rescue group might be able to reach them from the adjoin ridgelines; it was possible that they could find a route out for the trapped people.

You decide to:

Join the rescue crew. You hike 2 miles with a 40 lb pack of supplies.

Join the rescue crew.  There is a small lake (2 large pool lengths) between you and the boat and southern edge of the forest service camp.  You swim to the boat and row it back to the rescue group. (swim + row machine).

You help prepare the camp for the new members.  Unfortunately, extra supplies are located in a rail car a quarter mile away, on the zombie plain.  You move across vehicles, trees and tool sheds to get to the rail car. (use playground toys to create an obstacle course getting to the rail car and back. Sprint all times you are on the ground).

Sunday, November 17, 2013

Z5. Nov 17, 2013. Day 48.

You wake up on the couch of the 'resort' (your little joke to yourself) after a nice nap. Other than chores, you have really caught up on sleep here. Your neck is twisted in an awkward position,  and unfortunate trail of drool has dried across the corner of your chin.  You feel thick and foggy and crinkled in the brain, and your neck is aching. The tv is playing some infomercial, too loudly. Your clothes are wrinkled into the shape of your body and have the greasy feeling of human oils. You want a shower.

It is then that a vile scent hits you.  You realize that you were awaken by a waft of this scent to begin with. Your body goes rigid. The scent is like… rotten broccoli… mixed with rotten eggs… mixed with a leather factory.  You brain reels trying to define the odor.

You focus on barely breathing, moving your head slowly, and just slightly, tense to run. In the dim light of the infomercial flashing you see it standing there. One of the infected. It rocks slightly. Bad eyesight. You remind yourself that the news claims they have bad eyesight at this phase of the infection.

You (either):
You jump up, screaming “ZOMBIE!!!” to alert the rest of the camp.  You sprint 0.25 mile at your fastest pace, to get away.

The zombie turns slightly. You have to get to the alarm bell 200 feet away. Sneak as quietly as you can, crawling if you have to, to get to the alarm bell.

You have 24 hours from when you read this email to complete this challenge.

Friday, November 1, 2013

Z4. Nov 1, 2013. Day 32.

This evening an alert went across all channels.  There was an outbreak this afternoon at the Miami-Dade Quarantine Facility. A second outbreak at a nightclub in downtown Miami at 8pm EST. Miami was placed under quarantine by the CDC and Homeland Security 10 minutes later.  Traffic has been streaming out of Florida toward Alabama and Georgia. A third outbreak occurred at 9pm EST in one of the traffic lines going into Alabama; the quarantine is currently throughout Florida and Alabama, and a state of emergency was declared. Martial law has been implemented. Louisiana and Georgia are under high alert, and also under martial law.   The most terrifying reports are that Homeland Security has started shooting infected Americans to hold the quarantine line.  Holy…

The news makes you feel like something is pressing on your chest. The anxiety crawls up your throat. You have to leave and protect your family and friends.  Several of your buddies have started a ‘fort’ out in the wilderness a couple weeks ago. At that time news reporters were making fun of them, and the EPA tried to arrest them using their SWOT team, until Congress told them to back off. The Forest Service made public statements to request the group, who called themselves “the Renegades” (sigh), leave. But the rumor has spread that the local forest service rangers started a second camp about two miles away, over the ridgeline.  You quietly pack up the survival gear that you have been pulling out of the garage and dusting off over the last few weeks.  You tell your family, your friends, your dog and your cat to pack up. Ok, you pack up the dog and cat. And you head up to spend the zombie apocalypse with the rest of the crazies.

In your head you are totally prepared to be camping until this whole thing is over. God bless engineers and construction guys. There is a running toilet and shower set up.  There’s even a television.    The camp is quite a lot larger than the number of people present; you are guessing it can hold 50, and there are about 30 people there. An eclectic mix of engineers, educators, medical professionals and artists.

As part of the camp, you are allotted certain activities to assist with building the camp up properly. You assist the group by doing at least one of the following (no injuries!):

·         Carry 10 gallons of water 100 feet.
·         Practice zombie defense/killing: You will need a medium weight rock about the size of a baseball. Get out to a hilly area and practice throwing the rock at an object about the height of a zombie head, attempting to hit the head. Do this until your arm is tired.  Try to increase your distance so that you wouldn’t be too close to the zombie.
·         Practice zombie responsiveness: be quick on your feet. Do 30 burpees as fast as you can, at least under 5 minutes.
·         Injured/sick: purify 10 gallons of water.
·         It is ok to do a selection from the October list.

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Z3. Oct 23, 2013. Day 23

Outbreak at New Ellis Island Quarantine Contained
By Anther Banghart - October 23, 2013 9:10 AM EDT. Online Edition
An outbreak at the New Ellis Island Quarantine Facility was contained Tuesday at 7:00 pm EST. The New Ellis Island facility is sectioned off by entry dates; the Day 14 section was affected. Officials have not released any official numbers, but approximately 20 individuals are believed to have survived; 200 are believed dead. Survivors have been placed in isolated quarantine.

The list of individuals affected will not be released until families have been notified.

This is the first outbreak in an American quarantine facility and the fifth in-quarantine outbreak internationally. Outbreaks in facilities in London, Madrid, Bombay and Tokyo have caused the deaths of 16,178 in last 5 days. This does not include the devastation along the equatorial region of Africa.  Early estimates of several million dead are considered low. 

An international state of emergency was issued by the
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and the World Health Organization (WHO) on October 19th during the first outbreak in quarantine (Madrid). All international travel to the continent of Africa has been halted except aide, medical advisers and peacekeeping forces.
Please note that this is another fake news story for the purpose of Zombie Apocalypse Survival Fitness Program, and any connection to any real people is imagined. Hey- you! Yes, you. Only 8 more days until the end of October. Several people have the zombie challenge done! Do you?

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Montana Logger- Zombie Challenge Complete!

City people are going to be amazed we had more than one "chop a cord of wood" as the selected zombie challenge. Go team!

Legacy, Zombie Killer! Zombie Challenge Complete!

This photo is fantastic! Good preparedness to start killing zombies straight away!